What Kind of "Mask" Do You Wear in Public?

What kind of "mask" do you wear in public? The title was inspired by the amazing story that made national headlines of the astronaut that was arrested for kidnapping and attempted murder of a woman that was also involved in a love triangle with her and another astronaut. What stood out to me about this story was the way the NASA Officials described her as a stable person and how this behavior was out of character for her. After all, this woman was a Naval Academy Graduate, an accomplished pilot, a career Navy Captain, and one of the few people in the history of the world that could say they've actually left the planet and traveled in space! As I heard these officials describe the person they thought she was, I couldn't help but wonder what kind of external "mask" did she wear that allowed her to conceal from the public all the inner turmoil that was going on within her troubled mind.

As I thought about it even more, I realized that we all wear public "masks" that allow us the opportunity to hide from the people around us. No one knows what goes on inside our minds, but our
"masks" allow us to show the illusion of happiness while our worlds are literally falling apart. People tend to think that achievements are an indication of how people are doing on the inside. That's why people are shocked when someone of extraordinary life achievement (like the astronaut) does things that are considered strange. No one ever expected her to drive 900 miles (wearing a diaper so that she wouldn't have to stop to use the bathroom) to meet a woman at the airport at midnight to kidnap and kill her, based on what was going on "inside her head."

Achievement can't cure the demons that drive people to acts of insanity, only hide them. The truth is, she's no different than the rest of us in our ability to conceal what's really going on inside of us. For instance, my "mask" says U.S. Marine, College Graduate, IT Professional, BJJ Black Belt, and now The Wise Grappler. While some people around me could think my life's been good and I have so
many reasons to be thankful, I could be at home every night in mental anguish, seeing no hope for me, just wanting the pain to end or on the verge of making a disastrous life-changing decision,
just like the astronaut.

No one is perfect and there have been (and probably will be) times in all our lives when the stress was so great, that it became impossible to wear the "mask" and the "real" you appeared. Instead of putting so much energy into denying the feelings brought on by stress, while maintaining our "masks", we should accept the feelings and take the steps necessary to resolve those feelings so that we can move forward in our development process and have more productive lives.